Self Care Sunday, Soul Food, Uncategorized

Self Care Sunday: Self Love Habits to Form

Hey y’all!

On Friday, we chatted about self-love at the core of what it is. Now, after emphasizing how cool and important it is, I thought it might be fun to give you some ideas of self-love habits to form to really make this a part of your everyday life!

These are things that I either already do or intend to implement in my life, so don’t worry; I’m not giving advice without taking it!

1. Make time for one act of self-care a day.

This is something I’m actively trying to implement in my life. You have to do ONE act of self care every single day. Could be as simple as taking time to read a few chapters of your favorite book and lighting a candle. Could be an intricate spa day with relaxing music and shopping. Doesn’t matter what it is, just so long as it gives you a nice break from the stresses of every day life.

animal-cozy-cup-218763.jpg

2. Positive self talk.

This one always makes me feel a little ridiculous, but it usually helps. Whenver you’re beating yourself up about something, or you’re just being really harsh, talk yourself out of it. Literally. I will stand there and go, “Okay, STOP. We are NOT doing this.” Out loud. (Usually I’m alone.) Then, re-route that thought into something positive. “Maybe I don’t have a lot of energy to do things today, but that’s okay, because I work really hard, and sometimes I just need a break.” See?

3. Forgive yourself!

Tip number three! FORGIVE YOURSELF! This one is SO hard but SO necessary. Sometimes, you’ll mess up. You’ll screw up a work assignment, get a bad grade, eat something that doesn’t fall in your healthy lifestyle. IT IS OKAY! Humans make mistakes. What’s important is that you can go, “Okay, I screwed up. It’s okay. It doesn’t define me. What am I learning, and how can I do better next time?” Then just leave it. That’s it. Takes practice, but super valuable.

4. Do what you NEED, even if you’re not feeling it.

Sometimes, showing yourself self-love is eating that ice cream you’ve been craving even though it’s not super healthy. But sometimes, showing yourself self-love is dragging yourself out of bed to go move, be it a full workout, a stretch, or a walk. Sometimes it’s making sure you get all your veggies in for the day, and drink enough water, and get enough sleep. These aren’t always fun things, and they’re not always what we feel like doing, but our bodies CRAVE healthy habits, and by doing these, you’re loving your body enough to put in the extra effort so that it gets what it really deserves

adult-autumn-casual-663437.jpg

So there you have it! Those are just four of my favorite ways to show your body self-love on a daily basis. What are some of things you like to do to keep your self-love rolling strong? Share in the comments below!

Soul Food, Uncategorized

What IS self-love, and why are we so obsessed with it?

We always hear all this talk about self-love and how important it is, but what exactly IS self-love? What constitutes as self-love? And why are we as a generation so obsessed with it?

I mean, think about it. Self-love wasn’t a term I heard until well into my college years. Self-love and self-care wasn’t something I grew up on, and I’m willing to bet most of you didn’t either.

Self-love at its core is defined simply as “regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristics).” Yes, I did google that, and yes I think it sums it up pretty well. Self-love is really just putting yourself first. Taking the time to do the things that make you happy, that put you in a good state of wellbeing (be it physical, mental, emotional), and that put you in the best place to take on life!

Self-love also means being kind to yourself. Not being too harsh on yourself for making mistakes, pep-talking yourself, and treating yourself now and again when you need it!

treat yo self.gif

All in all, self-love comes down to just truly taking care of yourself and being cognizant of all your needs. So why are we so obsessed with it today? It seems every time you turn around there’s a new article or post about how to show yourself a little bit of self-love. Maybe it stems from the new emotional and psychological awareness this generation seems to have. Millennials seem to be a lot more sensitive to the true state of our emotional affairs than generations prior were.

Think about it. The norm even as early as twenty years ago was to bury your emotions, to just get over it, and to not rock the boat, even at the risk of having to suppress some deep-seated trauma. I’ve asked my mom about this in the past, and the best answer she has is “That’s just how it was,” because that’s really all there is to it!

Now, thankfully, we have much more of an emphasis on lifting each other up, lifting ourselves up, and caring for the all around well-being of ourselves and others. I love the self-love movement, and I’ll be the first to admit I preach it to anyone and everyone. Here’s to continuing loving and caring for the wonderful person you are; whether you know it or not, YOU DESERVE IT!

bill-billboard-empty-953162.jpg

Uncategorized

One Month Down: Grad School Reflections

Hey everyone!

For today’s post, I thought I’d take a look back at the last month that I’ve spent in grad school. I finished undergrad in May 2017, and I started a M.A. program this fall in public relations.

The program I’m in is only a year long, so it’s broken into modules instead of semesters, which makes it pretty intense. I’m not sure what exactly I was expecting, but it’s a combination of things. The program is really intense, and can be difficult. Some things I am really struggling with (like my Photoshop class). Other things I am genuinely enjoying to the point of them not feeling like assignments (like event planning and PR plans).

Time Management:
One thing I didn’t miss was how much time school takes up! There’s two nights of the week I spend in class, which doesn’t sound like much, but when you’re trying to cram everything into a day, the time slips by. I’ve definitely had to try to relearn time management. I was great at it in my undergrad, but nowadays I find myself struggling more.

One of the major things I’ve had to learn is that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I can’t do all of my homework, and complete assignments for work, and prep all my blog posts, and clean my house, and then go bartend or make it to class. I have to do a little bit each day, or dedicate one day to each pursuit. I’m still struggling with this idea, but I have to say I’m learning to accept it more.

PLANNER.jpg
I’m OBSESSED with my Happy Planner! It helps keep me in line with everything I have going on. 

 

SELF CARE IS MANDATORY! 
I’m also learning how valuable time is. Why waste it watching hours of netflix when I could be prepping blog posts or working on a project? If I’m using my time for something else, it’s because I have made a conscious decision that it’s necessary self care. Watching one episode of a great show with a candle, or reading a magazine to relax. The couple hours I get in the morning to do devotionals and to go to the gym are KATE TIME and those are not negotiable things. Sometimes I have to verbally tell myself that I am only human, and I am allowed to spend time taking care of my body, mind, and soul.

Everything comes to an end.
Just as the good things unfortunately end, so does the stress. By August 2019, I will have a master’s degree. It’s less than a year,  and like I tell myself, you can do ANYTHING for a year. It’s just a matter of balance and willpower, and some days are harder than others, but I find that as long as I keep my eye on the light at the end of the tunnel, things feel a little lighter.

book-book-bindings-close-up-669988.jpg

These are my reflections so far. I’m about halfway through module 1, so we’ll see how I’m feeling come Thanksgiving/Christmas when I’m gearing toward the end of Module 2 (There’s 6 of them.)

Are you in grad school? Do you have any tips?! PLEASE let me know! Thanks!

BLOGTOBER, Uncategorized

ANNOUNCING: BLOGTOBER

Hello everyone!

Wow, sorry, my life has been a bit chaotic as of late, but I am BACK and hopefully getting more organized!

I just wanted to take a few minutes to announce something really cool that I’m really hyped about! I really want to get deeper into blogging, since it’s such a great creative outlet, and Lord knows I need some good stress relief. So I’ve decided that this upcoming month, I’m going to do BLOGTOBER!!

What is Blogtober, you ask? WELL, Blogtober is when we celebrate the month of October (one of the GREATEST) with a NEW BLOG POST EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!!!

I’m SO excited, and I have SO many ideas! I even wrote a blog post for a friend’s blog, so stay tuned for that.

Anyway, I hope you’ll stick around and read these, and if there’s anything in particular you’d like to see, LET ME KNOW!

Thanks! Talk to you soon!

bonnie-kittle-592059-unsplash.jpg
I’m as happy and smiley as this lil guy right here just thinking about this next month!!! 
On My Bookshelf, Soul Food, Uncategorized

MY OWN HAPPINESS PROJECT!

Hi! Yeah, that’s in capital letters, because I’m excited!

I’ve read Gretchen Rubin’s “The Happiness Project” approximately four to six times over the last few years, and it never ceases to change my outlook. I’ve toyed with the idea of starting my own happiness project (she even gives you the tools to do so), but never thought it was the right time, never knew how, etc.

Well, NOW, I’ve decided there’s no time like the present. Starting this blog was a gift to myself to start exploring more things that truly make me happy, and I’m going to do it again by starting a legitimate happiness project.

Gretchen Rubin’s happiness project went from January to December, twelve months. I rather like the idea of taking an entire month to devote to one purpose, although I also feel like I’m the kind of perosn who just wants to leap into everything.

Screenshot 2018-09-19 17.02.25.png
A screenshot of the resolution chart that Gretchen Rubin offers on her website to help you stay on track! 

While I still have to iron out all the exact kinks for when I start, I did already come up with my own 12 commandments (well, hers are 12, mine are 13) and Secrets of Adulthood. Some of these are from the book and some are my own, but I’ll just post them all together.

My 13 Commandments:

  1. Be Kate
  2. Act the way I want to feel
  3. Enjoy the process
  4. Spend out
  5. There is only love
  6. Let go, let God
  7. Be the bigger person
  8. Don’t put it off
  9. Be honest
  10. Stay present
  11. Remember whose opinions matter
  12. Don’t overthink
  13. Be a person who makes everybody feel like somebody

Secrets of Adulthood

-It’s okay to ask for help.
-No one actually cares what you’re doing.
-If they do, that’s their problem.
-Do good, feel good.
-Your gut is usually right.
-By doing a little each day, you can do a lot.
-It’s important to be nice to everyone.
-Bring a sweater.
-Keeping your space clear keeps your mind clear.
-What you do everyday matters more than what you do once in awhile.
-You can’t help what you like.
-You can do anything, not everything.
-And you won’t be good at everything.
-Over the counter meds are helpful.
-If you think someone might appreciate something, they probably would.
-To be happy, I need to think about feeling good, feeling bad, and feeling right in an atmosphere of growth.
-The days are long, but the years are short.
-One of the best ways to make yourself happy is to make other people happy, and vice versa.

I’ll be posting periodically about this, and I’m hoping it might inspire some of you to start your own happiness project, and then we can be happiness project buddies, and everyone will be pleased.

That’s about it for me today! Talk to you soon!

On My Bookshelf, Uncategorized

On My Bookshelf: “The Happiness Project”

Happy Monday!

Here’s a nugget of Monday wisdom for you:

80ac7d8adaf9a2d30528a8c8e5d829d2

Anyway, I want to talk about one of my FAVORITE books today, “The Happiness Project” by Gretchen Rubin. I’ve read this book honestly probably four or five times, and I learn something new everytime. Gretchen decided one day that she wanted to be a happier person, but wasn’t quite sure how to do that, so she did a bunch of extensive research (and I mean EXTENSIVE! It’s quite admirable.) and decided that she was going to start a Happiness Project.

She outlines all the research she did in the book. She created a set of commandments for herself, which range from things like “Be Gretchen” to “Spend out.” There are also the Secrets of Adulthood,  which are simple nuggets of wisdom she learned throughout her life, such as “Bring a sweater,” and “It’s okay to ask for help.”

She splits her project into twelve months, with twelve main focuses (one per month.) It’s a cumulative project; in January, she focuses on vitality and boosting energy, so in February, she’ll focus on her marriage and bringing more love PLUS January’s goal, and so on. She outlines the overall headings, the smaller goals she decided would get her to the larger goal, and she goes deep into how she went about accomplishing them and how it felt.

happiness project

 

This book takes such a look at the ways we approach happiness, the definition of happiness, and even goes into psychology with intrinsic vs. extrinsic motivation, and things of that nature. This book never made me THINK so hard about happiness, and it really shows that if you want to truly be happy, you have to put in the effort in the areas of your life that bring you joy. Being happy is definitely, in part, a choice.

I would 10/10 recommend this book to anyone. It helps to give me perspective, makes me examine my own life, and dare I say motivates me to choose happiness everyday.  You can pick it up on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, or Target.

 

Self Care Sunday, Uncategorized

Self Care Sunday: Reflection

Hey hey hey,

Happy Sunday! This is the second Self Care Sunday post of this blog’s existence, which I’m excited about. So I figured today, I’d kind of just delve back into how my weekly focus on self care went in order to better direct the way this is going to go.

This week was hard, no lies. It’s not that I had a lot to do; it’s actually the opposite. I had a lot of time this week to sort of sit around and do nothing, and that is definitely not how I prefer to spend my time. I like to be goinggoinggoingoinggoing all the time. So this week, I was actually pretty sad and feeling useless about it. As much as I maybe didn’t handle it as well as I should have, it was an important lesson. It’s important to be able to sit with being by yourself and not having much to do. It’s not healthy to be moving at light speed every single day. It’s nice to have time to read a book, watch a show, sleep in a little more, dedicate yourself to an especially good workout. As it happens, I did all of those things this week.

Yeah, it was actually really hard for me, as crazy as that sounds, but I did something as a result of that. I scheduled today to purposefully be a pretty slow day after a busy weekend. I slept in a bit, took my time getting ready, and spent the majority of my morning at church. It was exactly what I needed today, and for the rest of this week. (It’s so crazy how sometimes it’s like, God just KNOWS what you need to hear!! Am I the only one who ever feels targeted??) I came home, ate a salad, read a book, and I did do the things I had to get done, but not like a crazy person. Not like my life depended on it. I just did them.

adult-armchair-beverage-846080
The look on this random stock photo girls’s face says it all; sometimes the most satisfying thing is just sitting down and having a cuppa tea! 

I’m going to finish a couple things for work. I’m going to eat some dinner. I’m going to talk to a friend on the phone. And I’m going to do the rest of the week like this; getting done the things I have to get done, but not at a speed where it feels like I’m punishing myself. Still making time to do the things that are good for me, whether it be mentally, physically, emotionally, or spiritually.

I think that’s a lot of what self care is, and that’s what I’ve learned this past week. It’s just being kind to yourself, living your life,  but living it in a way where you’re comfortable just being sometimes, you know?

That’s my self care reflection; next Sunday is going to be something super exciting, and I can’t wait to talk about it! Have a good week everyone; I’ll talk to you tomorrow!